Introduction
Within the St. Louis local area, there are 15 food deserts as
defined by the USDA. (Taking
the Desert, n.p.) Food deserts are areas that
are without a market that offers fresh produce and whole foods (not the store,
but rather the category of food) within walking distance, usually a mile.
These food deserts perpetuate poor health in low-income communities by making
it difficult to live more wholesome, healthy lifestyles. Currently in the
broader St. Louis area, grocery stores have been closing steadily for the
past decade. (Taking the Desert, n.p.) In
turn, more have been opening in these grocery store-less areas. But
unfortunately, they have trouble staying open. Multiple
colleges and foundations such as Washington University, Saint Louis University,
and the Incarnate Word Foundation have been attempting to implement changes in
these impoverished areas without access to fresh foods. Such attempts
have included the St. Louis MetroMarket, a mobile farmer’s-market-like store
within a refurbished metro bus. (St. Louis MetroMarket) Innovations such
as these will make it easier to provide healthy food at a price that
lower-income areas can afford.
Since St. Louis is experiencing such a
rise in the number of food deserts, this issue is very relevant both to time
and importance. With so many people
without the proper supplies, information, and ingredients to cook healthy
meals, the threat of an increase in malnourishment and/or obesity is on the
horizon. Through the establishment of
new and innovative mobile and permanent markets within food deserts of the St.
Louis area, low-income residents who before do not have access to fresh healthy
food because of location and/or money problems will be able to have these foods
easily and readily, which will improve the surrounding communities and
economies.
This establishment of new markets will be done through the passing of
laws that require any food desert as defined by the USDA to either have a
mobile market available every day, or a permanent market built similar to a
farmer’s market. Both of these will offer local produce and meat, where
the prices will be lower than that of chain health food stores such as Whole
Foods and other grocery chains. Both of these sell imported produce, which drives the price up. Because the
produce will be mostly local, this will benefit local farmers and businesses
that grow this produce. Similarly, since there are distinct growing
seasons in the Midwest, this will mean the fruits and vegetables offered will
be seasonal, which means they will be at peak flavor and contain more nutrients.
These markets will also offer weekly lessons using common produce found
at them and including educational information about how and why to cook with
certain foods, and the nutritional benefits of them. Building and
establishing these markets will be a beneficial learning process for the area,
and will make the community feel more attached and proud of something they had
a part in.
Because there is an abundance of information on how eating fresh
food effects health, my arguments will be based on these facts, and I will
present them in the most unbiased way possible.
The argument that providing areas access to healthy food that were
previously without should not be a conflict of interest, but when the subject
switches to the means by which this food is provided, problems may arise. Unfortunately, the issue that caused areas to
be without fresh food is the same issue that will continue to make it more
difficult- money. Without the proper
funds, bringing markets to neighborhoods that need them is nearly impossible. Although money will be needed to bring these
markets in, the use of local produce will stimulate the local economy and in
turn can bring more money into the area.
Going about passing a law of this sorts should not be a conflict
considering it will be creating a social hub where residents can purchase their
groceries, learn about what they are eating and how to cook it. Areas that
previously do not have access and education on healthy whole food will be able
to learn and teach others the benefits of enhancing one’s diet, and over time
will improve the overall health of these communities.
Style Guide
STRUCTURE
Paragraphs should each cover one topic
Subdivision can be used for subjects that may need to be broken up into sub-topics
ie: A paper written about a book may have paragraphs about the setting, the plot, the characters, and the purpose/meaning
These paragraphs are always started with a topic sentence and ended with a conclusion that ties back to the topic sentence
Use an ‘active’ voice rather than a ‘passive’ voice
referring to something in the past tense is not as direct as referring to it in the present
active voices state things, passive voices remember or recall things
Never use the word ‘not’ to express a negative subject
Instead of referring to something as ‘not’ this or ‘not’ that by means of stating it is the opposite of some characteristic, refer to it as being this or that
ie: Not happy -> Sad
Not fun -> Boring
Not on time -> Late
If a sentence can have words taken out and it still produces the exact same meaning, take out the extra words
This makes sentences more concise and to the point
Use the same sentence structure to express similar or opposite ideas
ie: Although __ is thought of as __, others argue that ___ is thought of as __.
ie: Formerly, __ was used for __, now __ is used for __.
Do not break up the middle of a sentence to add a point or fact, add it either to the end or beginning for a better sentence flow
The subject and verb of a sentence should never be separated by another phrase
Summaries should always use the same tense
If summarizing an event, use the present
If summarizing a story/novel, usually the present tense is used but the past tense can be used if the writer wants
Always place the most important part of the sentence at the end
When placed in the middle, it can be passed over without much thought
FORM
Leave a blank line after headings
Parenthesis within a sentence hold statements that stand alone, and includes all end
punctuation other than a period, and the rest of the sentence flows as if the
parentheses were not there
Always have a comma before quotes within a sentence, and a colon before formal quotes
It looks like you made some great changes to your introduction that will make your paper even better overall. Your topic is extremely intriguing, I can't wait to read more and hear about solutions to the problem. Great work!
ReplyDeleteGood job. I can easily understand what it is you want to happen and how it can be done. It got me interested in the paper, making me want to read more, and I see that you made helpful changes. This is a good introduction overall, but I think it would be better if you summarized the different topics in one paragraph.
ReplyDeleteYou did a great job of citing your information. I was always a little confused on food deserts, but after reading your introduction it gave me a much better understanding on what it is and how you plan to fix it. Great start to your paper so far!
ReplyDelete